Ahh, so it’s Christmas and we can start to relax.  Instead of being all serious, here are a few little stories about things that went wrong around the world in the legal arena this year (these are from Week on the Web on which are all the original links to the international sources):

• A mistake by a bailiff in a Houston, USA, courtroom led to a murder trial being declared a mistrial. It was only after all the testimony had been heard, the jury had deliberated and the verdict was being given that the judge noticed there was one jury member too many.

• A man in the public gallery of an Australian courtroom was lucky not to be charged with contempt after his mobile phone went off in court. The problem was exacerbated by his ringtone – the sounds of a woman in the throes of pleasure echoed around the silent courtroom until he finally managed to turn his phone off.

• A 25-year-old man from Oregon, USA, wandered off from jury service after only half a day in court. The judge issued an arrest warrant for the missing juror on charges of contempt. When the police finally caught up with him, the juror said he had been “extremely bored.”

• I hope no-one gets any ideas from this one…… A 38-year-old man who was on trial for burglary in San Diego, USA, took drastic steps to ensure his request for a mistrial was granted. After his initial request was rejected by the judge, the Defendant brought a bag of his own faeces to the courtroom, which he proceeded to rub on his defence attorney and throw at the jury. The judge declared a mistrial and the Defendant was assigned a new lawyer.

• I can think of many times when this would have been a good idea….. A judge in Ohio, USA, frustrated with constant interruptions from a defendant, warned him that if the disruption continued, he would have his mouth taped up. The defendant didn’t take the judge’s warning too seriously, and after yet another interruption the bailiff taped up his mouth with duct tape.

• It was never this interesting when I went to the Central Criminal Court….. A trial at the Old Bailey, London, England, had to be temporarily suspended after a female juror became inadvertently distracted. Sitting opposite the juror in the raised public gallery was a transsexual who had dressed in a skirt, but forgotten that women generally wear underwear and cross their legs when seated…..

• An American man, desperate to avoid jury duty, tried to make himself as undesirable as possible for jury selection. In his pre-selection questionnaire and interview, the gentleman declared himself to be racist, homophobic and a liar. Unfortunately, the judge saw through his tactics and he found himself facing possible perjury charges.

• Can you imagine this?!?!    A judge in Colorado, USA, has come up with an unusual punishment for people who break noise pollution laws by playing loud music. The guilty party, who is usually a young adult, has to sit for one hour and listen to music such as Dolly Parton and Karen Carpenter being played loudly in the courtroom.

• Defendants must give some thought to what they wear before appearing before Florida judge Daniel Perry. The judge has a very strong objection to men wearing loose and saggy trousers, and any defendants who enter his court room ‘with their rear ends hanging out their pants’ are immediately sent back to jail to find more suitable clothing.

Amazon.co.uk regularly sends me emails about books it recommends – and I realise that I’m not alone in that respect.  Today’s recommendation made me realise that maybe I need to change my job or diversify my reading tastes because today, Amazon recommended “Cholera: The Biography”, with 40% off.

I don’t know what to say.  Perhaps “Congratulations” to the author, Christopher Hamlin, because it’s a big thing to get a book deal  (I just got one, with Harper Collins – woohoo!!).

An infra-red photographic technique is being developed in the UK to help Police determine whether a suspect has had a tattoo altered or removed: Change your tattoo at your peril if you have criminal intent.  Tattoos are, of course, nice and distinct and are often used to identify people – there aren’t the usual cross-racial identification problems or other problems associated with witness trauma because tattoos are so often compelling to the eye.  Preliminary investigations suggest that infra red examination of the skin can show up what has happened to the otherwise non-visible dermis, such as tattooing, surgery or laser treatment.  Using IR cameras to take photos of suspects will of course speed up the entire process, which is always good when the Police are investigating crimes, usually against the clock.

If it works it could be very useful but I have to ask, if a criminal is sharp enough to know that their tattoos could be used to identify them, you’d think they’d go to appropriate lengths to ensure they’re covered up during the commission of a crime.  Still, I guess there will always be the occasion when someone sees themselves on Crimestoppers or Police 10-7.

It seems that Police in England have developed a “crime scene kit” to give to bar and pub owners for the collection of glass after drunken brawls. Glassings or bottlings (when a glass or bottle is smashed before being thrust into the victim, often in the face) are a common occurrence in British society, usually after 10 pints of lager and shortly before a kebab on a Saturday night.
The biggest problem with cases of this type is that the witnesses are often pissed and can’t clearly remember what happened, the CCTV footage isn’t too clear and the glass used in the event gets crushed and then swept up because, obviously, it’s dangerous. In cases where broken glass is successfully recovered, the forensic results can be very good – fingerprints can demonstrate the manner in which a bottle was being held, DNA from blood can show whose body said weapon was used against but, as I just indicated, this type of information is often lost in the aftermath.
Police in Plymouth, Devon, have decided to try to combat this problem of lost evidence by handing out clean dustpan and brush kits to local pub and bar owners so that they can collect the evidence for later examination (City bars given ‘crime busting’ dustpan and brush).
To me, this could go one way or the other. On the one hand, it’s good because the collection of this sort of information could potentially increase the number of successful convictions in what is an horrendous and often life-altering event for the victim. On the other hand, there is no chain of custody with law enforcement personnel. A bar manager could choose to ‘fit someone up’ because, let’s face it, the chances are that that they know the troublemakers. I think only time will tell with this one but I’d be interested to be involved with cases of this type as an independent expert, just to see how the prosecution laboratories and the Police handle the evidence collection side of things.

The debate about DNA rages on with Victoria, Australia, temporarily halting the use of DNA in criminal cases because of a problem with interpretation of results after new technology was brought online in September. As a result of the new technology more detailed information was obtained from DNA samples but the statistical models used to interpret the data are now inadequate (Police put ban on DNA evidence). Victoria’s Police Forensics Lab is having a rough time of it lately, with staff refusing to attend court and then being threatened with legal action, a rape case falling over because DNA evidence was contaminated and other issues having a deleterious effect on how the laboratory is running.

Happily, DNA evidence in England now seems to be fairing much better after the suspension of Low Copy Number DNA evidence in 2008 following the spectacular collapse of a major trial against a man charged with one of Northern Ireland’s worse bombings – the Omagh bomb in 1998 (DNA test halted after Omagh case). A man was recently cleared of rape (after he’d been sentenced in 2002 to six years’ imprisonment) as the result of DNA evidence that showed he had not penetrated the victim but that there was evidence of the DNA of three other males on the swabs from the Complainant (Man given six years for rape cleared by new DNA evidence) and another man was convicted after a random “hit” on the DNA database. To me it shows that DNA is one of those areas of forensic science where you can never take your eye off the ball.